Running vs. Me. A Battle That I Almost Lost

(Please excuse me, because this is kind of rambling but I felt like I needed to talk about what I went through this morning...)

This past week's weather was not cooperating with me and so I wasn't able to run besides Monday.  I was not happy with this and knew that if I had any hope to still be able to complete the Queens 10K on Sunday, that I was going to have to get out there today and run no matter what.

So I did!

I looked at the weather forecast last night and saw that there was a chance of thunderstorms tonight, but that the morning was going to be sunny and clear.  I am not a fan of running in the morning, but I knew that it was what I was going to have to do unless I wanted to run in the rain (I didn't.)

I woke up early and decided that I was going to run my 4 mile route in Central Park.  Yes, it's full of hills (hills that I haven't run in over a year) but I wanted to push myself.  I wanted to complete it and feel strong.

Unfortunately, neither of those things happened.

I think my big mistake was that I was not hydrated enough.  I also don't think I ate enough this morning.  So my body was thirsty and hungry.  Two bad things to have when facing 4 hot and humid miles.

The New York City Triathlon was today and as I started out my jog, I was enjoying watching the runners getting close to the finish line.  A full triathlon is no joke and I was in awe of these people.  I also was thoroughly impressed that there were a number of "normal" looking people.  In other words, people who were not skinny.  I hated to say it in my head, but I thought to myself "If these people can do a triathlon, I can certainly do 4 miles."  Man, I need to learn to not underestimate these people and to stop judging because they showed me up!

I started struggling about a mile and a half in.  Yup, that's it!  A mile and a half!  I decided that I was going to walk for a minute and then I started running again.  Then I had to walk again.  This continued on and on until about the 2 and half mile mark.  I was defeated.  I used to run this route no problem.  I ran this route last year no problem!  What the hell was wrong with me?  I ran 5 miles on a treadmill just in May!  I had certainly not lost this much of my stamina in just two months...  I decided to walk the rest of the way back to my subway stop.  I continued to watch the runners and I got more and more defeated.  I was never going to be able to do anything like that.  Even though I've lost a lot of weight (and I'm INCREDIBLY proud of that!) I still have fitness goals that I want to achieve!  I want to run a 10K again.  I want to run a half marathon!  I don't think I want to do a full marathon, but I would love to maybe do a triathlon!  I couldn't even run the equivalent to a 5K today!

I texted my friend whom I had said I would run the Queens 10K with and told her that I wouldn't be able to do it.  The heat was too much for me.  I felt like such a failure as I sent that text.

And this, ladies and gentlemen?  Is why I love my friends...

She picked me up out of my slump and she convinced me I could do it.  She's a slower runner like myself and she utilizes the run/walk method.  I've always tried to be a straight runner (because of my stupid elementary school gym teacher's voice in my head telling us we were failures if we couldn't even run a mile without walking) and so I always saw this method as kind of cheating.  But Abby (my friend) is a beast.  She has run A LOT of half marathons and even though the NYC marathon was cancelled last year she ran the course.  26.2 miles this girl has completed by using this method.  It's the method that the Walt Disney World running events recommend.  As I was texting her I asked if I could copy her on Sunday; Run when she runs and walk when she walks.  Maybe if I could do that on Sunday, I would be able to complete the 10K.  I had said that I didn't care about time, and I still don't.  I really just want to cross that finish line!  Abby said that she would be more than happy to have me by her side on Sunday.  She made me feel like I could conquer the world.  Seriously, she might need to look at another career as a motivational speaker because she was amazing!

So, I'm still going to do the race.  I'm going to get outside this week as much as possible and try and acclimate myself to this heat.  I am going to finish this race on Sunday come hell or high water.

And I think I might start adopting this run/walk method for longer distances.  We'll see how it goes!

I'll keep you posted this week!