Why?Because this week I seriously ate crap and barely got to the gym. What was the result?
I'm up 8 pounds from last week.
Yup, you heard that right. I am kind of disgusted with myself. I'm kind of hoping that some of it is water weight because of all the salty crap that I've been eating but I'm not going to count on it. Instead I'm going to mentally slap myself across the face, stop eating crap and get my ass back to the gym.
Today started my mental reboot and so far, so good. I went to the hotel gym and put in over an hour, doing both aerobic and strengthening exercises. I pushed myself and it felt great. I upped my weights, I added time to the elliptical and afterwards I felt like I had accomplished something. The interesting thing? I felt guilty for not doing more. Like, I think I must have weight gain guilt because I felt like I almost needed to punish myself by doing more at the gym. Has anyone else experienced this? Like it wasn't necessarily a positive, motivational feeling... It was a "it's your fault you're in this predicament and now you must pay for it..." feeling. Like I felt bad for not doing a full hour on the elliptical. Hmmm, maybe I should look more into this.
Anyway, I plan on eating better today than yesterday and that's what I need to remember. I just need to keep in my head the idea of "How can I make today better than yesterday?" With that thought constantly running through my brain I can't lose, right?
Here's hoping.
I so know that feeling. For me sometimes it feels like I am trying to replace the binge thoughts with another thought that can be just as destructive.
ReplyDeleteI get that feeling sometimes. Especially when I would go to the gym right after a binge ... it would be painful, but I'd be telling myself "you don't have a choice, you have to make it at least break even - you're going to hurt, and you won't even lose. Was it worth it?" It's just as bad as the binge itself. Another bad thought I have sometimes is overdoing food restricting after a bad weigh in.
ReplyDeleteEach day is a new day. Learn from yesterday, but don't punish yourself for whatever happened then. Move forward and focus on where you want to go from here.