Highest Weight: 310.0
Last Week Weight: 238.4
Current Weight: 239.2* Must be noted that weighed on hotel gym scale, not my own
Current Gain: +.8
Total Loss: 70.8
For the purpose of this blog, I am going to use this weigh in to be accurate. I know that its not my own scale (that is currently at the theater packed in my other suitcase) so my own scale could say something slightly different. I wouldn't be surprised if it were accurate though, but we shall see.
In regards to my experiment from last week about weighing in daily? As much as I would like to do it everyday, its just not going to be possible for me to weigh in everyday because I do have to pack my scale Sundays and I typically won't have it again until Tuesday nights for a Wednesday morning weigh in. (Didn't get it last night though, hence the different scale.) Aside from the necessary breaks in the weigh ins, I did actually feel like the daily measurements were working. It was keeping me to constantly be thinking about what I was eating, or how much I was exercising and the effects that it would have on what the scale told me. So, I might continue weighing in daily when I can, we'll continue with this experiment. I think I'm going to give it a full month and see what my weight is at the end of it.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Friday, December 9, 2011
Dreamers of the Dreams
One of my favorite movie quotes of all time is from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (the Gene Wilder version, not the Johnny Depp version...)"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of the dreams..."
I'm sure it's probably actually in the Roald Dahl book, but I never read that as a child... Anyway, that's besides the point.
I always loved this quote but I never actually lived by it. Aside from a few career oriented goals, I never allowed myself to dream. I lived by the cynical viewpoint of "why dream dreams, because its not like they are going to come true..."
How sad and depressing is THAT!?!
Now, I am happy to admit, I have a completely different outlook. I find myself not only setting goals, but dreaming dreams. Since I started this adventure 15 months ago, I feel as though I can accomplish what I set my mind to, so why not shoot for the moon? Kind of a complete 180, don't you think?
Before I never even dared to dream that I would back to a more "normal" size. That I could look in the mirror and say "Lookin' good today!" That I could run for miles, or being lifting weights on a regular basis. If I can achieve those things, who knows what else I can do? The sky is the limit as far as I'm concerned.
Man, it feels good to be happy...
So, what kind of dreams are you dreaming?
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Weigh-in Wednesdays Return! 12/7/11 Edition
Highest Weight (9/1/10): 310.0
Last Official Weight (11/19/11): 245.0
Current Weight (12/7/11): 238.4
Weight Lost since last weigh in: 6.6
Total Weight Lost: 71.6
With the invention of Maia 2.1 I have decided that no matter what the outcome, I am back to posting my weigh ins. I will see even a bad number as a learning experience and I will take from it and grow. That is something that I forgot... Accountability. If I see a bad number, its because I earned it. Either through blowing off workouts or not eating as I should. I will hold myself responsible for my successes and my failures.
I am back to tracking food. That means that I need to be eating more foods that I can track (ie, not eating out so much!). When I was first losing weight, I maybe ate one or two meals a week that I didn't completely prepare myself. I would guesstimate what their calories were and I would still track them. Even if I was off by a bit, I was still noting them. I haven't done this in a LONG time. Even towards then end, I would typically stop tracking my food after lunch. That's not okay! That's not properly holding myself accountable!
There is currently a trend in the weight loss blogging world where people are tracking their weight daily in order to hold themselves accountable for their decisions the day before. I'm debating whether or not to do this myself. I would only officially count the weigh ins on Wednesdays, but in order to make sure I make good decisions everyday I would step on the scale and make note of it. Maybe I'll try it for a week and see what it does for me mentally. If it screws with my head too much, I'll stop and go back to just weighing weekly. However, if I find it does affect my day to day decisions and I see the results? Maybe I'll stick with it...
Tune in next week to see if I do the daily weigh in challenge! Until then, live healthy lives and make good choices people!
Weight Lost since last weigh in: 6.6
Total Weight Lost: 71.6
With the invention of Maia 2.1 I have decided that no matter what the outcome, I am back to posting my weigh ins. I will see even a bad number as a learning experience and I will take from it and grow. That is something that I forgot... Accountability. If I see a bad number, its because I earned it. Either through blowing off workouts or not eating as I should. I will hold myself responsible for my successes and my failures.
I am back to tracking food. That means that I need to be eating more foods that I can track (ie, not eating out so much!). When I was first losing weight, I maybe ate one or two meals a week that I didn't completely prepare myself. I would guesstimate what their calories were and I would still track them. Even if I was off by a bit, I was still noting them. I haven't done this in a LONG time. Even towards then end, I would typically stop tracking my food after lunch. That's not okay! That's not properly holding myself accountable!
There is currently a trend in the weight loss blogging world where people are tracking their weight daily in order to hold themselves accountable for their decisions the day before. I'm debating whether or not to do this myself. I would only officially count the weigh ins on Wednesdays, but in order to make sure I make good decisions everyday I would step on the scale and make note of it. Maybe I'll try it for a week and see what it does for me mentally. If it screws with my head too much, I'll stop and go back to just weighing weekly. However, if I find it does affect my day to day decisions and I see the results? Maybe I'll stick with it...
Tune in next week to see if I do the daily weigh in challenge! Until then, live healthy lives and make good choices people!
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Maia 2.1: The Newer and Even MORE Improved!
I don't know if you, my few readers, have noticed but I took a bit of a hiatus from the blog. I felt like I wasn't writing anything interesting. All I kept reporting was that I hadn't lost any weight, that I needed to get my eating back on track and that life on the road was good and interesting.
Well, I'm back and I still am reporting those same things. I've been fluctuating within the same five pound range for the majority of the past two months. I did drop down to my lowest weight of my adult life at one point, but two weeks later had sky rocketed back up. I am happy that while I'm not eating the greatest things in the world, (scrumptious tater tots, I'm looking at YOU!) I'm still eating a helluva lot better than I was 16 months ago. So, maintaining is good thing I suppose. Because honestly I feel like I've been living like I would once I stop actively trying to lose weight and it shows that I will be able to maintain it. However, the problem is obvious: I still have a lot of weight to lose! I can't be okay with just maintaining!
As of my last weigh in, I have about 40 more pounds to lose until I hit my weight loss goal. I can do it. My problem comes with the snacking. My meals aren't horrible, and my snacks aren't horrible. However, I'm simply eating too much when I snack! I'm a grazer for the most part and I currently have a mound of snacks by my desk. What do I do with food sitting out in front of me? I eat it!! So, I'm officially cutting back on the snacks. I need to remind myself that I don't need to eat unless I'm hungry! I need to feel hunger again. I am currently snacking too much to really feel it! I will keep a yogurt or a tangerine around to curb a hunger pain, but I don't need eight different snacks to choose from!
My workouts have been lacking for the past week, but I'm not worried about that. It was a stressful week and I went away for the weekend to visit a friend and made a choice not to pack my gym stuff. The nice thing is, that I made a very difficult decision last week. A decision that will result in a LOT less stress in my life (which I think might have also been contributing to my weight retention. Stress is NOT good for losing weight!) Plus, this barrier was causing me to start to morph back into a much less happy version of myself. This version was bitchy and unhappy. I don't like that version of myself. But, I'm MUCH happier after I made this decision and that is also helping me to refocus and find my BALANCE again!
See, that's the other thing I realized during my hiatus. I looked down at my tattoo (did I ever mention on here that I got a tattoo before tour? I got a set of scales on my left wrist as a reminder to stay balanced... guess I need to look at it more often!) and it hit me that I'm all out of whack. So, beginning this week, the balance shall be restored.
Meet Maia 2.1. She's the even newer and better version. Maia 2.0 was awesome, but she still had some flaws, so the kinks are being improved upon and expect to see the even shinier and newer Maia coming soon to a theater town near you. :)
Well, I'm back and I still am reporting those same things. I've been fluctuating within the same five pound range for the majority of the past two months. I did drop down to my lowest weight of my adult life at one point, but two weeks later had sky rocketed back up. I am happy that while I'm not eating the greatest things in the world, (scrumptious tater tots, I'm looking at YOU!) I'm still eating a helluva lot better than I was 16 months ago. So, maintaining is good thing I suppose. Because honestly I feel like I've been living like I would once I stop actively trying to lose weight and it shows that I will be able to maintain it. However, the problem is obvious: I still have a lot of weight to lose! I can't be okay with just maintaining!
 |
| The Snack-age. There used to be more! |
My workouts have been lacking for the past week, but I'm not worried about that. It was a stressful week and I went away for the weekend to visit a friend and made a choice not to pack my gym stuff. The nice thing is, that I made a very difficult decision last week. A decision that will result in a LOT less stress in my life (which I think might have also been contributing to my weight retention. Stress is NOT good for losing weight!) Plus, this barrier was causing me to start to morph back into a much less happy version of myself. This version was bitchy and unhappy. I don't like that version of myself. But, I'm MUCH happier after I made this decision and that is also helping me to refocus and find my BALANCE again!
Meet Maia 2.1. She's the even newer and better version. Maia 2.0 was awesome, but she still had some flaws, so the kinks are being improved upon and expect to see the even shinier and newer Maia coming soon to a theater town near you. :)
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Nothing New To Report
Same weight... Same frustration.
I am exercising, but I can't seem to get my eating under control. Yada, yada, yada... Same ol', same ol'...
Getting really frustrated with myself. I was SO CLOSE to such an amazing goal and then I had to screw it up. Really don't see a lot of my goals happening now, or if they do not for a long, long, LONG time! I'm really upset about it.
I was thinking about it and I lose 40 pounds in 5 months when I first started this thing. And over the course of the past 10 months? Only 25 more. That's not okay in my book. Yes, I still lost, but not nearly what I should have.
I know I sound like a broken record but I REALLY need to get back on track and I just can't seem to do it!!
Ugh.
I am exercising, but I can't seem to get my eating under control. Yada, yada, yada... Same ol', same ol'...
Getting really frustrated with myself. I was SO CLOSE to such an amazing goal and then I had to screw it up. Really don't see a lot of my goals happening now, or if they do not for a long, long, LONG time! I'm really upset about it.
I was thinking about it and I lose 40 pounds in 5 months when I first started this thing. And over the course of the past 10 months? Only 25 more. That's not okay in my book. Yes, I still lost, but not nearly what I should have.
I know I sound like a broken record but I REALLY need to get back on track and I just can't seem to do it!!
Ugh.
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Weigh In: 11/5/11
Well, I only lost half a pound from last week so that says to me that it definitely wasn't water retention that caused the weight gain last week! It was poor choices...
I've been really great about exercise this week (including Bikram yoga!) but I am still obviously off in terms of my eating. I know the bad choices as I make them, I am just not stopping myself from making them. That's kind of a big deal... Hello self restraint? Where have you gone? Why have you forsaken me?
Time to man up and start making difficult choices again. Like to stop eating after 9 PM. Like to get a side salad instead of fries. Like to walk by the bucket of candy in the Stage Manager's office and not grab a handful.
Come on Maia. You can do this. Get back on track!!
I've been really great about exercise this week (including Bikram yoga!) but I am still obviously off in terms of my eating. I know the bad choices as I make them, I am just not stopping myself from making them. That's kind of a big deal... Hello self restraint? Where have you gone? Why have you forsaken me?
Time to man up and start making difficult choices again. Like to stop eating after 9 PM. Like to get a side salad instead of fries. Like to walk by the bucket of candy in the Stage Manager's office and not grab a handful.
Come on Maia. You can do this. Get back on track!!
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Bikram Yoga Adventures
The other night in the office, a co-worker asked me if I wanted to venture to a Bikram Yoga (hot yoga) class with her. Having only attempted Bikram once before in my life, and it was on the hottest day of the year and I was about 70 pounds heavier, I decided that I should give it another shot.
We signed up online for the class to ensure our spots and also I did it so I knew I couldn't back out of it. If I had already paid for it, I would definitely go. The next morning we walked to the studio which was about 20 minutes away and I proceeded to get more and more nervous as the walk continued. I knew that I wouldn't be judged for not being able to do every pose full out, but more I was nervous about what this was going tell me about myself and my journey thus far. I was setting a certain expectation on myself on being able to achieve more in this class than I had in the one several years before and while I was pretty sure that I would do better this time, the thought still crossed my mind that maybe I wouldn't...
As we got to the studio we were greeted by two very nice guys behind the counter, one of which was going to be the instructor. He recognized my name immediately when I signed in and he proceeded to walk me through the basic breathing as I signed the release form. I had my ankle surgery in between the first class and yesterday and it didn't dawn on me that it might affect my ability to do some of the poses. It did end up affecting me.
After signing in my co-worker and I went into the room to kind of adjust to the temperature and just get into the mind set for class. It was definitely warm but I didn't feel uncomfortable like I usually do when I get hot. Oh, I also dressed more appropriately for Bikram this time than I did the last time. Last time I didn't know that it was a hot yoga class and I had on sweatpants! BAD mistake! This time I had on my capri running tights and a Nike workout top, both made from material whose purpose is to wick away moisture from the body. Every little bit helps, right??
Okay, here's the first sign that I knew yoga might not be for me... The yoga instructor came into the room and I almost immediately burst out laughing. Because guys tend to not wear shirts during Bikram, the instructor came in wearing shorts and nothing else but that's not what made me laugh. It was the fact that they were CHEETAH print shorts that basically looked like boxers that almost made me snort. I purposefully didn't make eye contact with my friend because I knew she noticed the same thing. Judgement over what people are wearing does not a Yogi make...
Once class began and we got to work on the standing poses I felt pretty good. Sweat almost immediately start poring from my body but I didn't mind at first. I had a little bit of a struggle with some of the balancing poses, especially on my right ankle, but I knew that those were things that would come if I continued to practice. I only sat down to catch my breath once and I felt good about that. I was pushing myself, but not outside of my limits. I noticed that people who were obvious frequent class attendees also sat occasionally so I didn't feel like a failure (like I did in the previous class.)
Actually it wasn't really until we got to some of the sitting poses, surprisingly enough, that I had some struggle. He did an entire series of moves that required me to sit on my ankles and I just couldn't do it. It actually really hurt my right ankle to sit on it, so I just sat and continued breathing and joined in when I thought I could.
The last series of exercises were a bit tough as well, but that was honestly because of how the instructor had us execute them. There was a lot of spinning around and sitting up and laying back down and it kind of made me dizzy. So, after about 15 minutes of spinning, sitting up and laying down I finally just stayed laying down for a couple of them. Those I was a little bit frustrated I couldn't continue, but oh well... The other sign that I knew that Bikram wasn't for me? Half of the time that we were on the floor, especially laying face downwards, all I could think about was how the carpet needed to be cleaned because it smelled like stale sweat. Not exactly a smell you want to be sticking you face into... Yuck.
All in all, I think I did much better than the other Bikram class I had attended. The instructor told me my goal was just to stay in the room which I most definitely did. I also did MUCH better with my breathing during this class than I had previously. I think that has to do with the fact that my body is used to exercise now though so I'm not forcing myself to remember to breath through a stretch. It just naturally does it now. I did feel very detoxed and refreshed after the class I will admit, but I still don't think Bikram is for me. Could I continue to do yoga on a regular basis? Yes, I do believe I could. But, I don't think Bikram is the right fit. At least I tried though, right?
As we got to the studio we were greeted by two very nice guys behind the counter, one of which was going to be the instructor. He recognized my name immediately when I signed in and he proceeded to walk me through the basic breathing as I signed the release form. I had my ankle surgery in between the first class and yesterday and it didn't dawn on me that it might affect my ability to do some of the poses. It did end up affecting me.
After signing in my co-worker and I went into the room to kind of adjust to the temperature and just get into the mind set for class. It was definitely warm but I didn't feel uncomfortable like I usually do when I get hot. Oh, I also dressed more appropriately for Bikram this time than I did the last time. Last time I didn't know that it was a hot yoga class and I had on sweatpants! BAD mistake! This time I had on my capri running tights and a Nike workout top, both made from material whose purpose is to wick away moisture from the body. Every little bit helps, right??
Okay, here's the first sign that I knew yoga might not be for me... The yoga instructor came into the room and I almost immediately burst out laughing. Because guys tend to not wear shirts during Bikram, the instructor came in wearing shorts and nothing else but that's not what made me laugh. It was the fact that they were CHEETAH print shorts that basically looked like boxers that almost made me snort. I purposefully didn't make eye contact with my friend because I knew she noticed the same thing. Judgement over what people are wearing does not a Yogi make...
Once class began and we got to work on the standing poses I felt pretty good. Sweat almost immediately start poring from my body but I didn't mind at first. I had a little bit of a struggle with some of the balancing poses, especially on my right ankle, but I knew that those were things that would come if I continued to practice. I only sat down to catch my breath once and I felt good about that. I was pushing myself, but not outside of my limits. I noticed that people who were obvious frequent class attendees also sat occasionally so I didn't feel like a failure (like I did in the previous class.)
Actually it wasn't really until we got to some of the sitting poses, surprisingly enough, that I had some struggle. He did an entire series of moves that required me to sit on my ankles and I just couldn't do it. It actually really hurt my right ankle to sit on it, so I just sat and continued breathing and joined in when I thought I could.
The last series of exercises were a bit tough as well, but that was honestly because of how the instructor had us execute them. There was a lot of spinning around and sitting up and laying back down and it kind of made me dizzy. So, after about 15 minutes of spinning, sitting up and laying down I finally just stayed laying down for a couple of them. Those I was a little bit frustrated I couldn't continue, but oh well... The other sign that I knew that Bikram wasn't for me? Half of the time that we were on the floor, especially laying face downwards, all I could think about was how the carpet needed to be cleaned because it smelled like stale sweat. Not exactly a smell you want to be sticking you face into... Yuck.
All in all, I think I did much better than the other Bikram class I had attended. The instructor told me my goal was just to stay in the room which I most definitely did. I also did MUCH better with my breathing during this class than I had previously. I think that has to do with the fact that my body is used to exercise now though so I'm not forcing myself to remember to breath through a stretch. It just naturally does it now. I did feel very detoxed and refreshed after the class I will admit, but I still don't think Bikram is for me. Could I continue to do yoga on a regular basis? Yes, I do believe I could. But, I don't think Bikram is the right fit. At least I tried though, right?
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